Tuesday, May 18, 2004

product watch: music up ramen noodles

We at the Warehouse regularly check with our competitors to see which innovative, exciting products are being showcased in their stores to gain margin, create excitement and bring customers into their shopping environment (Eds Note: This is the type of retail jargon I have to clean up on a daily basis. Now you know why we're crazy). We've purchased some of these items, and will present some of interesting finds.

There will be parameters. If it's a food product, it must be something we're convinced could be edible. You won't be seeing items like Diet Moxie, any Atkins baked goods, fermented mustard pickles or any pasta made with Papa Smurf's Special Sauce. This week, we visited an Asian grocery store in Scarborough and checked out the wide variety of ramen noodles. The Kashin company has tied their products in with everyone's love for pop music. May we present to you MUSIC UP!

Music Up Pork Ribs Flavour
Music Up Pork Ribs Flavour
Note emphasis on word "flavour", as it's clear these gals have never eaten a slab of ribs. Also suggests that they're trying to capture the flavour of something soulful or deep felt, but come off as an imitation. This is the punk/new wave band of the bunch, with the bizarrely-outfitted twins, the Converse-wearing drummer who wears her leg warmers on her arms ('cuz it's kewl) and the sexpot lead guitarist, who's on the verge of leaving the band to "find her own voice".

Music Up Minced Chicken Flavour
Music Up Minced Chicken Flavour
The flavour suggests this is going to taste like weak hamburger, which is exactly what this band looks like - an integrated pre-fab band formed in the last round of "Manga Idol". We have the two singers towering over the boy-band wannabes, including the guitarist up front who's a closet grunge fan but knows he'll never get to play dirgey guitar with this crew.

Music Up Stewed Beef Flavour
Music Up Stewed Beef Flavour
Right after Minced Chicken's album flopped, the boys split off from the girls (who went on to a short-lived career as a duo until they discovered nobody cared anymore) and decided they needed a stronger sounding name...Stewed Beef. Note the intensity in the two guys on the right. Grunge Boy can finally do his thing, while Red conjures up a watered-down version of his classic rock frontman idols. Star, on the left, didn't last much beyond the wrapper shot - he was too happy for this new, intense (and still manufactured) band.

No comments: