One) | (Two)
Ontario Drinking Rules
Continuing with our ongoing look at Detroit in 1970 through the eye of a hipster guide, it's time to find a place to eat.
Bob's Picture Bar (Grand River & Cass) - "About forty years ago Bob came up with this rather grand scheme of chronicling human progress by covering the walls of his bar with pictures (and spicing up uninteresting periods with cartoons from Esquire). Unfortunately for the historically-minded, it looks as if human progess stopped about 1940...the floor is so uneven your knees may buckle as you walk."
Cabaret LaBoheme (Ponchartrain Hotel) - "If a genuine bohemian ever walked in the here he would probably be booted the 23 floors down."
Flaming Embers (Grand Circus Park) - "This is the place to go to get your bad $1.29 steak for $1.76. And you get to watch as they scorch it."
Ham Heaven (E. Congress) - "The sign of a good sandwich shop is that there are always two or three cops hanging around the counter."
Kow-Kow Inn (McNichols, W of Woodward) "The Kow-Kow confirms the rumour that for really good Chinese food you should head in the direction of a Jewish neighbourhood."
Mauna Loa (W. Grand Blvd, across from GM Building) - "The Mauna Loa is more psychedelic than anything you will read about in our UNDERGROUND chapter. Every inch of its enormous interior is splashed with colors and shapes, optimistically intended to evoke images of Polynesian catamarans slung from the ceiling...don'r be afraid to stroll around and stare; there's no one who isn't a hick in this place. The Bombay Room is billed as 'an authentic touch of India', which if you've ever been to India, is the kind of joke that makes you want to cry."
Meyer's Sea Food (Michigan Ave in Dearborn) - "Decor is early French Brothel."
Shakey's Pizza Parlor (8 Mile east of Van Dyke) - "No amount of public relations and gimmickry will ever give Shakey's any soulfulness. Sorry."
Tom's Tavern (7 Mile and Wyoming) - "At 74, Tom has no patience with restaurant pomp. The menu is in his head. If you're concerned about the price, then help with the meal. The less bother you are, the less it will cost. When finished with your lunch, simply pick up your dishes, walk into the kitchen and clear them off. If you want another beer, go pull it out of the cooler; it will just be assumed that you are a regular customer." (Note: Tom ran the place until he was 95!)
To maintain our Canadian content requirement, we'll cover Windsor eats and other notes about the Rose City next time. - JB