Monday, November 22, 2004

santa claus is coming to town

Met up with the gang for our yearly ritual of watching/mocking the Santa Claus Parade. This year's viewing spot: Bloor and Bathurst. Went down to meet everyone, but didn't immediately see them. After a quick phone call, discovered they were around the corner, on the opposite side of the street.

Cue horror movie scene trying to reach them.

The crowd was thick, with little room to move. Right at the corner, movement came to a dead stop. I was squished in the crowd, more crowded than I'd ever been. Two people near me almost put up their dukes, because one guy refused to have his view obstructed for five seconds to let somebody through. Nobody got through, as more tried to push their way in both directions. If anybody had fallen, it would have been curtains.

It was nearly enough to send me back onto the subway.

Somebody finally pushed through and the crawl resume. Finally made it across the street and joined the others. It took awhile for the stress to wear off - when my camera was being temperamental, I flew into a steady stream of language not fit for children's ears.

But hey, it was a nice day.

Choice quotes from the peanut gallery. Those who uttered these phrases shall remain nameless (I didn't write their names down!):
"Hey, take a look at the rod!" - a float featuring a lazy-looking animal fishing, with a very long rod.

"It's an angry woman chasing those poor children...then she got caught in the star and lost half her body" - an accurate description of one float that passed, one that would have beem worthy of destruction in Animal House.

"Hey, it's the United Nations!" - a marching band carrying a dozen-and-a-half flags. We noticed the marching bands were over-enthusiastic this year, with the leaders honing their finest imitations of Robert Preston in The Music Man, with more gusto.

"More children to the fire!" - a float with a bunch of kids sitting in the interior of its midsection - don't remember for sure if it was the train advertising The Polar Express. Whatever it was, it seemed like an advertisement for child labour.

"Is that a business goth?" - on our way over to the Duke of York, passed a woman in black business clothing and very dark makeup. Soon, somebody coined the term "busigoth". Sounds like a idea to build a sketch around...

Suggestions for our own floats were tossed around, such as a tribute to alternative energy (buy tons of baking soda to use for an "erupting" volcano) or a crossing the Santa Claus and Pride parades (folks marching in nothing but Xmas skivvies). I wonder if Caribana has ever thought about lending floats/costumes...


Hey, hey, the gang's all here...except for a couple off to grab some samosas.


We kept running into cute kids fascinated by our merry band of freaks. This girl kept patting and playing with Tipper. She also patted Mark's leg, but we think it was her way of telling him to get out of Tipper's way.


We ran into kid #2 at the Duke of York, after the parade. He quickly became Jess' new boyfriend. He also drooled his lunch into a mound of coats. The kid's ready for higher education.

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